Archive | October, 2013

Proud

22 Oct

Tuesday morning, 6am. A new day has begun and before getting ready for work, I feel like writing this.

A few weeks ago I had the courage to walk into the Crossfit box for the very first time. And now, I can’t imagine not going. I can only manage twice a week, but I’m building up to three times now. First thing I do in the morning is check what the WOD is. When I walk into the box, I pretty much look like Bambi, caught in headlights. Scared! Can I do this? But once I get going, I’m off. And I feel so strong and powerful. I do the scaled version of just about everything, but that doesn’t matter. Because I’m giving it my all, the full 100%. And it feels awesome to do that.

I hated P.E. in school. I was always the slow kid, the last one to finish, the one that couldn’t climb the rope etc. The kid that never got picked on the team. I’m still the slow one, the last one to finish, the one that can’t climb a rope. But it’s different now. Because I’m working hard for it, both mentally and physically.

The coaches are great, they motivate me and respect me. The same goes for my fellow CF-ers. And that makes all the difference. Every WOD I find myself doing things I couldn’t imagine I’d be doing. For 1 hour I’m focused on me. The rest of the world doesn’t exist. And when I finish and I high five everyone, I don’t feel like that kid in gym, or the fat person in the gym. I feel awesome. I feel respected and I feel strong. Because I did this! And I’ll get better, stronger, faster along the way.

My ultimate goal: to climb that rope all the way to the top. Yes, the slow kid will do it. Even if it takes me a year or two.

What a great way to start my day.

Sunday thoughts

6 Oct

2 days after my first crossfit workout I went on holiday. 10 glorious, lazy days in Cyprus. Good thing I hadn’t planned anything active, because I sure felt my body! And yes, I was very thankful to find out that my apartment there had a bath. Soak and relax those muscles.

For the first time ever I kept my ‘mode’ going during my holiday. I did some walking, swimming, push ups, squats, sit ups. Not too crazy, but enough to stay active and focussed. I cooked my own meals and have to say, I did very well. Finding fresh veggies was a bit of a challenge, it took me 4 days to find lettuce. I think I’m the first person on this planet to be excited to buy lettuce!

So, a week ago I came home after a week of lazy days by the pool, reading books and thinking about life. And I came to one conclusion: I’m doing pretty well for myself. I’m learning to realise that this is the one life that I get and that it’s up to me what I do with it. The same thing goes for my body. It’s the one place that will always be a true home to me, so I’d better take good care of it and make it as healthy and strong as possible.

Last Wednesday I signed up for another crossfit class. It was 8pm, I was tired and just wanted to go home. But I went. For a second I felt bad about having to ask for a lower box to step on, when doing box jumps. The fat one can’t do it. It was school all over again. But I shook it off. I’m here to improve myself and this is just my starting point. I do have to remind myself of that.

The coach who was there the first time, was here again now. He was glad to see mee again. He gave me lots of great pointers and motivation. Another coach was great to me as I was doing my ring rows. Others can do pull ups, or band assisted pull ups. I’m not there yet, so what. It will come. I will work for it.

I’m going back again this week, and I’m still scared to go “can I do this?” but excited as well. So I’m going to keep going back, to improve myself.

I’m feeling strong. Both physically and mentally. If I can bring myself to do this and overcome these barriers, there’s nothing I can’t do.

And that is a wonderful thing to realise on this Sunday evening. Bring on a new week!