Feeling good!

10 Aug

Whoohoo, weighed in today and I’m down 5 kg! (In total, not in one week of course). Only 45 to go haha.

Work has been very stressful this week and normally I would turn to food for comfort. To my own surprise I haven’t had that urge once this week. Ok, when I was going to the supermarket after work, and I was hungry, the chocolate looked verrrrry good. But no problem leaving it where it was. Last Thursday I had a horrible day at work, I was tired and just wanted to go home. But I had my gymbag at work, because that morning I decided to go after work.

So, to go or not to go? I went. I literally dragged myself there. But boy, did I feel good about myself for going. Is this the so called turn-around point people talk about? I’m feeling really good about myself, I feel healthier and I enjoy making good choices over unhealthy choices. That means more to me than the number on the scale.

On to the next week!

Feeling good

From fatty to fitty. My goal: Color Run 2014

6 Aug

Well, it’s been forever since I posted. Life just got in the way, but I guess that’s a good thing. Because that means: no drama! On the other hand it also means: nothing really exciting. But life have been good to me, so I’m not complaining at all. Got great friends, I like my job and even went on a nice holiday earlier this year. Life is good.

There’s been one thing in my life that I’ve never been able to tackle though: my weight. As a child I was skinny but as I hit puberty, I gained weight. I got severely depressed at 15 and that didn’t help matters. At all! For as long as I remember I’ve been on diets, you name it, I tried it. And where did it get me? Not losing the weight and my body not responding to a healthy lifestyle as somebody else’s body would do.


Now at 38 years old, I’m done. For real. Watching Extreme Weight loss episodes, I got inspired. I tried a low carb diet before and my body responded to that. For a while. I’ve been reading up about Chris Powell and his theory on carb cycling. It sounds like something that could work for me, so I’m committed to making this a success.

Today I had my second low carb day of this week. I did very well, adding some more (good) carbs tomorrow. It takes a lot of effort to prepare everything, but I enjoy it. It gives me a great feeling to do something for my health.

I normally go to the gym 3 times a week, at 7am before work. I have a new goal now: I want to run the 5k Color Run next year.
So my friend, who’s also a running coach, volunteered to be my coach starting September. Our goal: running the Color Run together next year.
I already started a running program, after I got the medical ok to do so. It’s interval training, slowly getting you ready for a 30 minute steady run. It’s hard, 3 times a week, but I feel so accomplished after I finished a session. I also added strength training, so a full body workout it is!

color run

My ultimate goal is to lose 50kg in total (110lbs). So far, I’ve lost 4 kg (9lbs) in a few weeks, so all is going well. Also my body is changing, for the better for a change.

I saw a motivational gimmick with marbles that I’m going to do. Take 2 jars, fill one with 50 marbles or 110. As the weight comes off, a marble will move from one jar to the other. A great way to keep track of my progress and to keep me motivated.


Well, that’s it for now. I’ll be posting here about my progress regularly. My ups and my downs. My triumphs and my weak moments.

Let’s do this!

And the train keeps on going…

21 Mar

Yes, it happened. I lost my marbles. Has anyone seen them?

I still have no definite news about the job I wrote about last time, but it’s looking very promising. In about a week I should know more if they can hire me for sure.

So that’s enough to keep myself occupied for now. You would think….

I moved to my current house last November. I’m renting this house from a friend who’s had it up for sale for nearly 2 years. No way that it was going to be sold any time soon and no way that she was going to lower the price. Until 2 weeks ago. My friend told me she decided to lower the price and someone came to take a look. The made a bid and she took it.

A week ago there was the phonecall: the house had been sold, the transaction will be on May 14th.

I’m happy for her that she finally got to sell the house so she can move on. But where am I going to go! She’s a great friend though so from the start she said she would do everything to can to help me out. And she did! She set me up with her real estate agent who just got an appartment to rent. Went to check in out this morning and presto: I will have a new home in May, in the same city. It’s actually a 15 minute walk from here.

I’m so relieved, sleep hasn’t been my friend this last week.

So, once again, I’m preparing a move. I’m getting the hang of this now, but please I’m done for now. Really, I am. With any luck I’ll be starting my new job at the same time as moving to my new house.

I know I said 2012 was going to be the year of change for me. Never thought it would be this extreme though.

Ah well, never a dull moment!


Has anyone seen my patience?

28 Feb

Patience is a virtue, they say. In some situations I amaze myself with the amount of patience I have. You need something untied and it’s a horrible mess? Give it to me and I’ll untangle it for you, no matter how long it takes.

So I do have patience. Well, some. Right now, I’m lacking patience though. I had a job interview last Thursday. It went great and I think I have a really good chance of getting it. But she had to interview about 4 other people, so I wouldn’t hear until during this week, to find out if I get a second interview.

It’s only Tuesday. I said to myself I shouldn’t expect to hear anything sooner than Wednesday. But I’m nervous. I want to know! I want this job, I’m the best person for it. And I think I really made that point during the interview. I couldn’t have done a better job than I did.

So I tell myself to stay calm, wait, be patient and be positive. Now if only I can get myself to listen to me.

Patience is a virtue. Who came up with that line?

Spring in the city

25 Feb

Wow, has it really been that long since I last wrote. My last post was made the day before I moved to my new home.

And here I am, in the house that now really feels like I belong here. I’ve grown to really like this city already, although I still haven’t seen half of it.

I’m happy here, I’m at peace. And that feels fantastic. Spring is in the air, radio is playing, coffee in my hand. My cat is happier than ever. The streets in my city are now filled with sunshine, people are out and about, the park is only 5 minutes from my house.

So I made the right decision coming here. It also changed other things in my life. I managed to lose 11 kilos since January, I go to the gym and I´m looking for a new job. I hate change, but once I get going I´m unstoppable!

Of course I still carry my demons with me. They´ll always be there. But I´m dealing with them now and that´s what life is all about.

You know what they say. Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it´s about learning how to dance in the rain.

And I´m learning.

Time to say goodbye

27 Nov

Here I am, my last night in my current house. Leaving most of my stuff behind, so saying goodbye to so many things.

It’s weird that this time tomorrow I’ll be surrounded by all new stuff in a new home. Of course I bring some of my own things to make it ‘me’. But still.

My new house will only have a shower, no bath. For the first time in my life I’ll be bathless. It’s silly things like that that cross my mind. My dad used to love a particular cabinet in my house. He was diagnosed with cancer a month after I moved here. He died a year later. Before I lived here, I lived with my dad. Just him and me, after my mum died. So moving here, meant leaving him behind. That was horrible. And then he got sick. Double horrible.

And here I am, about to make a fresh start in a new house, in a new city. And that feels right. It feels good. But it also means saying goodbye and confront myself with lots of things. Material things, good memories, bad memories.

I was listening to Il Divo’s new album today. One of the songs is Time To Say Goodbye. So beautiful. And it really got me going. I need to make a lot of changes in my life. And this is the first step to accomplish that.

So, it’s time to say goodbye to my house, my furniture, my ghosts. I’ll be ok.

The curse of the single 30-something.

7 Nov

Here I am, at Starbucks, having a nice vanilla latte and lemon poppy seed muffin (low fat of course).

People coming and going. This one’s at the airport, so it’s literally people coming and going. From anywhere, to anywhere. Lots of people watching to do, nobody really interesting though.

And then there’s this guy who takes a seat in the comfy chair next to you. Reading architectural magazines, well dressed, good haircut, nice profile and if you squint he could be Bradley Cooper’s great-great-cousin. Or at least his great-great-cousin’s neighbour. Gorgeous eyes too and the right age.

Ah and he’s even reading an article about Greenpeace. And even his travelling bag looks good!

There must be something wrong with him right? Hmmm I wonder what it could be. And there it is! The gold band on his right hand. Dammit!

The curse strikes again. I’d better get myself another latte. Better luck next time (yeah right).

Oh, and he’d better not be trying to read my screen, oops.

Moving on, literally and figuritavely

11 Oct

Well, in my previous post I talked about having to make some major decisions. This evening I emailed my friend that I want to move into her place, so that means that I’m going to be moving out.

The first word that comes to mind is: eeeeeeeeek!

I don’t do change, I’m terrible at making decisions, always have been. I remember when I was 8 and my mother told me that we were going to move to another house. I freaked out! I didn’t want to leave my room behind. Even when my mum told me we could put everything in my new room as it was now, I still wouldn’t calm down. Because it was not my room.

That never really changed I think. When I went to work in my current job, I left my previous job after 6 years. It was like saying goodbye to family. I might be moving on to another job next year, the next level. Just thinking about it now gives me a headache. Again, I don’t do change.

And now I’m going to move, knowing that I’m going to have to find another place. So now I have to make so many arrangements. And that’s the one thing I dread. Well, not making the arrangements. Actually doing those things and figuring out how to do them.

I have to clear out my entire apartment, take out the floor, remove furniture and put some of it in storage. I’m going to get rid of most of my stuff. The place I’m going to be moving into is furnished (with way better stuff than mine, I might add) and when I find a new place, I want to make a fresh start, with new things. It helps that I don’t like most of my stuff anyway hehe

I might move in December, so that would mean Christmas in a new place and starting a new year in a new home.

Ugh, I wish I could just click my heels and have it all done. Ah well, guess I’m going to start making my to do list.
Step 1: find strong, hunky men to help me move my furniture hehe.

OMG, I’m actually going to move to a new house, a new city, eeeeeeeek!

Memories versus change

25 Sep

Sometimes you have to make decisions in life. Your head tells you it’s the right one, but oh, if only things were that simple.

I’ve been living in my apartment for 8 years now. Before I moved here, I lived with my dad, after my mum died 3 years earlier. So it was a hard for me to leave him. How would he cope on his own? But it had to be done. So in December, the apartment was ready for me to move in and I went. My dad helped me out wherever he could. He bought me my curtains, helped paint the place and went shopping with me.

A month after I moved in, my dad was diagnosed with cancer, just like my mum. So instead of organising a housewarming, I was going to the hospital with my dad for endless tests and treatments. He died a year later.

Till this day, my apartment still holds memories of that period. I still have the same curtains, the paint is still here, the memories are still here. Good and bad. But I now feel that it’s holding me back. I need to move on.

So I decided to go look for a place in another city, near work. A friend of mine, who lives in another city, has her place up for sale and she offered it to me, to stay there until I found something near work. So it looks like I’ll be moving soon.

I know that I have to move on, start over fresh. New city, new house, new furniture, new life. And I know that my memories will still be with me, wherever I go. First of all, I don’t like change. I’m just not very good at it. So this would be huge for me anyway. But the thought of leaving this place, knowing that this is the only house that I’ll ever live in where my dad has been, is a painful one.

But I’ll be ok, wherever I go. I might be leaving the curtains behind, but the memories will still be with me.

So, anyone willing to help me paint?

Heaven in a cup

24 Sep

I know that it’s hard to believe for many people, especially from the US, but here in the Netherlands a Starbucks is hard to find.

3 train stations in the country have a Starbucks and you can grab a latte at Amsterdam Airport, but that’s it.

Until now that is!

Earlier this year it was announced that Starbucks is opening a few stores in Amsterdam. Yippie! And that’s not all. No, it gets better. There was going to be a Starbucks 5 minutes from work. The opening had been delayed many times and everyone was starting to wonder if it was ever going to happen.

But, slowly but surely, it was becoming evident that there was indeed going to be a Starbucks. The lettering on the outside, and a board outside, counting the days until the grand opening.

And last Wednesday, finally, Starbucks opened. And heaven opened and angels sang! Okay, maybe not that dramatic.

Last Friday my colleague and I went to check it out. Nice weather, so a perfect walk during our lunchbreak. They turned it into a lovely place but why did everyone have to be there at that exact same time?

We placed our orders: a tall crème brulee macchiato. Yes, you read it right: a crème brulee macchiato. I was heaving a pretty bad day at work. But that delicious, perfectly sweetened coffee drink just made my day. It was like having your dessert and your coffee at the same time. Heaven in a cup indeed! Oh, don’t you just love how simple life can be at times?

creme brulee macchiato